Posting has been light I know. The news it seems goes round and round chasing it's tail and never winning. What would it do if it caught it anyway? So with that thought we present the latest and greatest washed rinsed and repeated of current events:
Freeze for Florida's citrus belt.
That happens. Crank up the sprinklers and hope it's not a long freeze. I bet those betting against orange juice futures are licking their chops.
Obama presses GOP to halt automatic spending cuts.
Not going to happen. Both sides of the aisle would have to answer to their wall street handlers. War is big business you know.
Nestle withdraws beef products.
Oh just run with it boys. N.E.S.T.L.E.S Nestle's makes the very best h o r s e m e a t. Comes in chocolate covered too.
Russia asks: How to stop space objects from hitting earth?
Well if you wouldn't shoot so much junk up there in the first place might be a good first start.
Seven reasons not to take a cruise vacation.
I can think of more than that. The idea of a cheap condom comes to mind for some reason. I'll let you make your own jokes on that thought.
Big diamond heist in Brussels.
Were they worried that maybe extremists might have gotten in and blown up air craft or the terminal? Of course not! In a statement:
"This is causing quite some unrest," said De Wolf. "It was incredible how easy it all went. This is worrying in terms of competitiveness, since other diamond centers are ready to pounce and take over our position."