Wednesday, July 6, 2011

Reality TV


Or should I say Unreality TV. I've watch only a couple of this new genre of TV a real win win for the networks. No real scripts to write. No expensive Prima Donnas to pamper and give 6 figure weekly incomes. People seem to crawl out of the woodwork to have their 15 minutes of fame. And maybe just maybe they'll walk away with some outlandish prize only to be let down later when the tax man comes around to collect his cut. Knew of one guy locally who won a new car only to have to take on a second job to pay the gift tax along with the license and fees that go with a new car. That wonderful 'gift' landed up costing him thousands.

Seems they've tried to turn just about ever profession into an exciting hour long program which would have been better left on the cutting room floor. And don't forget the teases just before the commercial break. Much like coitus interruptus the rug is pulled from under us just as the contestant is about to find his/her fate. And nothing is ever resolved until the very last two minutes of the show. And we wonder why people go berserk or turn to the internet for their entertainment. Pop up blockers are a must have and anyone throwing an ad at the beginning of a video is bound to loose site traffic once word gets out. Mark my words once Twitter and Facebook start squeezing ads into their overall plan it'll be game over. P2P will leave the tech boys scratching their heads.

So what's next on our reality show tour? How about the adventures of Peter the Plumber? Armed with just a snake and plunger Peter sets out for the big city to tackle the most dangerous clogs the world has ever known.(Must be a town with a large peanut butter factory) Will he use his snake or grab for the plunger? Stay tuned after these words from our sponsor.
It should have been an easy job. It was after all an old American Standard, a three gallon flush. Grabbing his mighty plunger Peter sets about to clear the clog. A couple of good pumps should do it but Peter believes this family has been on a low fiber diet with plenty of corn. One pump two pumps and just as he's about to give it one good shove we break for a commercial but not until the camera does wild gyrations, the screen goes dark, and bleeped expletives are heard. And upon return our hero is seen laying on the floor laughing but he quickly stands up and pulls the handle to that flushing sound we all know. A job complete to the tearfully grateful family who have been standing in line at the bathroom door in great anticipation.

Hey it was my turn next Ma cries the youngest to the laughter of the clan.

And tune in next week to find out if Peter can get little Billy's hamster out of the kitchen sink drain.

5 comments:

The Blog Fodder said...

I'll watch for it.

Randal Graves said...

Given our fellow citizens' propensity to watch any old crap - badoomboom - this could be a hit. Start shopping it to the networks.

BBC said...

I've never seen a reality show.

S.W. Anderson said...

I enjoy Pawn Stars, several HGTV and Food Network shows, and a few others.

Reality shows that call for people to be humiliated, eat disgusting things or stupidly risk their lives leave me cold. But the worst of the lot were the MTV ones with a cast of crashing, self-possessed, twentysomething bores sitting around a house they've been given, talking about themselves and each other, about how they get alon, or don't, who's doing who, or not.

an average patriot said...

I just really came aware of it last week when my son mentioned a "monster fish show him and the kids watch. I saw deadliest catch. giant snakes, all kinds of screwed up mindless show. Shit if you want to see nature run amok open your front door people. They're ridiculous!