Whyz it that somebody dies and they were always looked on with kind words and flowery orations? Usually should this happen at the prime of life there's nearly always a candle light vigil complete with stuffed animals and balloons or a road side marker. There was the exception of Ms. Thatcher who upon her death would cause that noted Wizard of Oz ditty "Ding dong the witch is dead" to rise to the top of the download charts.
Some of these folks slid on out of their earthly coil somewhat forgotten by all but their colleagues. Sorry but does anybody really remember John Palmer? No? "Okay then it's back to you Chet and David" would be all I could remember. Another passing of late is Michael Ansara and all I can remember of him was he usually played the part of an indian in most TV westerns in the 50s shaved head and all.
In other useless news we have the Powerball jackpot at $400 million. Bet you 20 bucks you don't win it!
Then there is the obligatory blurb of the latest celeb getting picked up on a DUI charge, sometimes with an ugly altercation sometimes not but we won't got there because who really cares? Geez you'd think these people could afford a chauffeur.
So what remnants of the news does that leave us with? Another stolen election in a country that no high school student today could find on a map? Sorry babe Africa isn't a country. Perhaps another car plowing into innocent bystanders on the LA boardwalk would be up your alley (pun intended) but that would be right up there with a high speed chase (yawn). What no puppy trapped in the well to divert our attention? But he was so cute when they pulled him out all dirty and whimpering. It takes the mind off the 100+ men women and children being bombed to death on a daily basis in Syria.
Okay you want mayhem? How about an implosion gone wrong with a guy losing one leg and maybe the other too? Boys went cheap and forgot the blast defectors on that one. Idiots! You're supposed to put sand bags around the explosives.
In sports we have the new American wasteland complete with steroidal touch downs/homeruns and bike race antics. Come on fess up, anymore sheep hormones in your system and you'd bleat.
That just leaves weather and there doesn't look like anything's going to happen in the near future here. But cheer up hurricane season is approaching and with any luck we'll have devastation and destruction to talk about for weeks. Just don't try to catch that on CBS if you have Time Warner.Okay one more for the road: