Monday, October 29, 2012

Weather you like it or not

As the lude and lascivious  Sandy grinds her way up the coast never were conditions more ripe for death and destruction. But being the sick puppies we are, everybody loves a good disaster, all eyes focus on the National Weather service. After all they have the best of the best super duper computers and numbers crunching nerds. Nothing throws people into a tizzy better than some catastrophic event be it fire or flood. Oh but the anticipation is finer than the best table dancer about to perform. And a fine day too for all the news crews scurrying about scraping for all the minute scraps of info to be had. But let us not forget the expert among experts rousted out of their ivy covered halls to give their take on things. Only they can't really give much better predictions than a delivery man or a dog catcher. It's all guesswork by anyone's stretch. You'd have better luck predicting the pattern of a balloon filled with paint spattered on a wall.

But this is the perfect of perfect of storms. And a few factors can be considered like the fact that today we have a full moon which means the tides are at their highest for the month. There's the fact that the leaves on the trees haven't completely fallen which make for dandy sails. There is the cold front coming down from Canada which gets to play havoc and intensify the situation. It's the end of the month about the time many are low on funds as in (What do you mean I have to evacuate? Where am I going to get the money to do that? ) And what disaster would be complete without the customary footage of the hardware store runs for plywood generators and flashlight batteries. And funny how the shelves always seem to be empty. Then of course there's the usual of usuals the news guy/gal who drew the short straw and has to stand out near the beach and endure gal force winds and rain while the home audience can't hear a word they're saying and gapes in awe as the gas station overhang gets ripped to shreds and blown down the street. Maybe they could just start using stock footage because they all start looking the same after a while. Good for the bottom line and who'd know the difference. Just make sure to cover up the dated hair styles with a rain hat.

Like waiting for a newborn this baby will come and the stories they'll tell of how they made it through the big one back in October of '12' always trying to one up the last one because you know how stories like that go.


BBC said...

If it does a lot of damage there will be work and wages fixing everything so there's always a bright side.

I don't think it will kill many, just improve the gene pool some, get rid of idiots that thinks it's cool to go outside and experience such things.

Mauigirl said...

I am still amazed the predictions actually got this right.

Randal Graves said...

I'm still amazed the cities were s-m-r-t and shut schoolin' down for the day.

Roger Owen Green said...

I think they get it right more often than they're given credit for. Its relatively lacklustre impact in Albany proper was just what our weather guy said.