Saturday, October 11, 2008

Friday news dump 10/10/08



A lot of stuff going on trying to go unnoticed at the end of the week. Helicopter Ben is dumping money into the economy like we were Haliburton in Iraq. While corporations are praying we spend money we don't have this holiday season, uncle Ben has been trying to grease the wheels of the banking sector. His rally cry "Lend damn it lend!!" Had the wall street swat team not stepped in at the end of trading Friday the market would have been down 1000 points at the end of trading. Geez do these guys ever run out of money? Banks seem to be playing a big game of musical chairs only some of the chairs are wired with C4.

John McCain has to back peddle after working his followers into such a frenzy that they shout "Kill Obama". Wonderful and civilized base you've got there John. Now the secret service has to work overtime. Can we send you the bill?

Caribou Barbie gets caught in her lies so what does she do? Issues a statement saying it's all lies. Sorry babe this was a bipartisan panel of the legislature that came to the conclusion. Gee you really must have pissed off your own party on this one. Oh that's right you do all those "mavericky" things I forgot.

GM is in talks to take over Chrysler. You know what that means? More lay offs and an even larger company to bail out later. How are those electric cars that nobody will be able to afford coming along? Anybody seen Lee?

Anybody want to buy a country real cheap? I hear Iceland's for sale. And at the rate America is going we can change our name to the United Socialist States of America. That's got a ring to it USSA like it USSA to be a capitalist country. Welcome to the new era comrade. Gee weren't commies blackballed? What a difference 50 years makes. Hey maybe we could get this socialism thing right. Naaah that's just wishful thinking.

N Korea is now being taken off the axis of evil list and the US will be talking to them. What happened to "we don't negotiate or talk to terrrrists"? My guess. They now have enough nukes to do some serious damage to this country so we better get friendly with them.

Oh darn I missed my Friday beaver spot. There's a beaver shortage out there you know. Save the beavers and the boobies too. Which leads me to:

Last but not least our government is now officially spying on all citizens, intercepting all phone calls. So be careful what you say. They especially love those sexy phone calls. So if you want an instant audience just talk dirty. Hey quit listening in ya perverts!

3 comments:

BBC said...

I think that someone has watched a lot of Red Green. I wonder what he would come up with for a sex machine.

I think that 'money' is just an abstract to them, there is not that kind of real money around, it's all just a bunch of frigging figures they have made up.

The real money, as in paper money and coins don't begin to add up to all those figures.

It's just a magical smoke show to keep us working. Too bad the rest of us can't make our own money figures up.

BBC said...

BOOBS?

Wayne John said...

How about everyone answer their phones with "The CIA will be bombed tomorrow, how can I help you?", then perhaps some light will be shined on the issue.

Nice tits BBC!