Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Intermission 2

Our second act was brought to you by these fine sponsors:

Crappy toilet paper When you really don't care use crappy.
"It's just as good as newsprint."
"What's newsprint grandpa?"
"I'll explain it to you some day Skippy."
And
Zombie sleeping tablets With Zombie you can drive and use heavy machinery!
Also
Group Death Insurance With Group Death you can afford to have it, you just can't afford to use it.
Group Death clearing the planet of sickies since 1962.

While you're out in the lobby we have some fine keepsake T shirts to remember tonight's performance. Made in China by slave labor these shirts are guaranteed to fall apart on the first washing.

3 comments:

an average patriot said...

That's funny, waiting for three!

Four Dinners said...

humanity in a short post.

We're doomed!!! Doomed I say!!!..;-)

BBC said...

Crappy toilet paper When you really don't care use crappy.

Not very experienced with such, are you? I moved here to be able to live off the fat of the land if I need to.

I know the public restrooms that have decent toilet paper and I'm not above taking 20 or 30 panels of it home if I need to.

Hell, just after I moved here and was living on the streets in my camper to learn all I could about such things Wendys alone supplied me with all the toilet paper and napkins and condiments I needed for the cost of a decent dollar burger to put in my gut.

I learned all the loops I could, for a year I didn't spend squat on food. With tighter times now that has likely changed some but even today I'll bet you I could go a month without spending more than twenty five bucks on food to keep me going.

I could teach you all kinds of tricks, but then you would know them, ha ha ha

Some things I just don't share online, doing so may make it harder for me to get by if others know what I know.