Look in the mirror almost ever day yet somehow never quite see what's there. I thought I used to be young and handsome but now just satisfied with being handsome. That is until somebody took one of those digital photos of my (what I thought was) adoring face. Sheesh somebody call the mortician! That guy should have been buried weeks ago. Okay okay I realize I'm no spring chicken. The vision is all but gone. The neighbors think I throw loud parties when I watch the news. And the other bodily parts are sagging like the springs of a 56 Olds. But geez I didn't think it would happen this fast. Getting a little jowly under the chin and where did those wrinkles spring up? Never paid that much attention to looks and I'm not vain enough for plastic surgery. Wouldn't want to look like Joan Rivers now would we?
But such is life guess you have to live with it until they slam the coffin llid shut. Had I know I was going to make it this far I would have taken better care of myself. Nah probably not. What fun would that have been? Don't you just love people who live with all the latest herbs and potions and health food trends only to land up worm food just like the rest of us? Sorry guys there are no loopholes when the grim reaper comes for you. He gets his man/woman every time. And who'd want to live to 110 when you wake up every morning and wonder "am I still here?"
So live life to the fullest. Eat drink and make Merry. And when Merry leaves jump for Joy. (rim shot). You only go around once in life and the opportunities get slimmer the older you get. Go for the gusto because Gusto's train is leaving soon if it hasn't already. Stay thirsty my friends because I'm not the most interesting man. I don't even like beer. At least not the stuff they pass off here. Beer is after all so (what's the word?) ... pleybeian.