Sunday, January 27, 2013

Stay thirsty when you grab for the gusto just don't look in the mirror


Look in the mirror almost ever day yet somehow never quite see what's there.  I thought I used to be young and handsome but now just satisfied with being handsome. That is until somebody took one of those digital photos of my (what I thought was) adoring face. Sheesh somebody call the mortician! That guy should have been buried weeks ago. Okay okay I realize I'm no spring chicken. The vision is all but gone. The neighbors think I throw loud parties when I watch the news. And the other bodily parts are sagging like the springs of a 56 Olds. But geez I didn't think it would happen this fast. Getting a little jowly under the chin and where did those wrinkles spring up? Never paid that much attention to looks and I'm not vain enough for plastic surgery. Wouldn't want to look like Joan Rivers now would we?

But such is life guess you have to live with it until they slam the coffin llid shut. Had I know I was going to make it this far I would have taken better care of myself. Nah probably not. What fun would that have been? Don't you just love people who live with all the latest herbs and potions and health food trends only to land up worm food just like the rest of us? Sorry guys there are no loopholes when the grim reaper comes for you. He gets his man/woman every time. And who'd want to live to 110 when you wake up every morning and wonder "am I still here?"

So live life to the fullest. Eat drink and make Merry. And when Merry leaves jump for Joy. (rim shot). You only go around once in life and the opportunities get slimmer the older you get. Go for the gusto because Gusto's train is leaving soon if it hasn't already. Stay thirsty my friends because I'm not the most interesting man. I don't even like beer. At least not the stuff they pass off here. Beer is after all so (what's the word?) ... pleybeian. 

6 comments:

Ole Phat Stu said...

You're only as old as the women you feel.
(Groucho Marx)

Tom Harper said...

You still look pretty youthful in that picture. Your hat is a bit dated though.

BBC said...

Froze my ass off at the shooting match, came home for a nap, and don't feel like a beer yet. Guess I'll make a cup of tea.

harry said...

What a bunch of stinking fucking pussies.

Randal Graves said...

What, you're too good for Goebel?

Aquarians Love To Fuck said...

"......And who'd want to live to 110 when you wake up every morning and wonder "am I still here?"......."

As the great Harry Nilsson would say, with his choir, of course:

I'd rather be dead, I'd rather be dead
I'd rather be dead than wet my bed
I'd rather be dead, I'd rather be dead
I said, "Dead than wet my bed"

Oh, I'd rather be gone than carry on
I'd rather go away than feel this way
Oh, I'd rather be there, where you haven't got a care
And you're better off dead, though it doesn't seem fair

Oh, I'd rather be dead, I'd rather be dead
I'd rather be dead than wet my bed
I'd rather be dead, I'd rather be dead
I'd rather be dead than wet my bed

I'd rather keep my health and dress myself
But you're better off dead than sitting on a shelf
I'll tie my tie 'til the day I die
But if I have to be fed then I'd rather be dead

And when he takes my hand on the very last day
I will understand because it's better that way
Oh! It's nice to be alive, when the dream comes true
You'll be better off dead, it could happen to you

Oh! I'd rather be dead, I'd rather be dead
I'd rather be dead than wet my bed
I'd rather be dead, I'd rather be dead
I'd rather be dead than wet my bed


Dearest BBC,

Thank you for sharing that with us.
Query?
What's it like loosing one's ass? Especially, that way?